So I’m having insane PMS-induced cravings for junk food dinner, and the first thing I pick up at the grocery store are bags of Hallowe’en candy. I now have 4 bags of snack sized candy bars and packets of Maynard’s Swedish Berries, mostly in preparation for tomorrow. However, I’ve had 4 mini KitKat bars already. I fear this won’t be the end.

On my way to the grocery store, I usually head down a somewhat busier, major road. This route takes me over the QEW, and for the past few months there has been construction on that overpass that with the crazy traffic stresses me out when I have to bike through there. I’ve been hoping that with the changes to those roads that they could have added a bike lane or something. Too many times drivers have come too close at faster speeds than I’m comfortable with. And on that particular bridge it freaks me out. Though I don’t believe that bike lanes are necessary in keeping cyclists safe, I do think they help a tremendous deal in keeping cars nicely sectioned off in their own lanes, separated from us.

Today wasn’t any worse. I didn’t get buzzed. However, some lady in the passenger seat of a white sedan had to yell out “STAY ON THE SIDEWALK” as they drove past me. Thanks for the tip, whoever you are. Even if the sidewalk wasn’t under construction, uneven and covered with bits of asphalt and tar, which it totally was, I wouldn’t have taken her advice. So as they drove off, all I could do was visibly and enthusiastically shake my head and wave. No way, bitch! With a smile, of course. I could have given her the finger. I get pissed off at people who choose to deal with cyclists on the road like this, but today I didn’t feel like getting into a fight with a fuckwit motorist on a busy overpass. And besides, I’m awful at comebacks. I’d most likely just have told her “No YOU stay on the sidewalk.”

Anyway, I’m going to get into the Swedish berries now. I wanted to buy a big bag of Jelly body parts (yum, i know), just to add to the whole spirit of Hallowe’en fun, but I checked the ingredients and found gelatin in it. And I’m not kidding myself into believing that the stuff I bought loaded with HFCS, modified milk ingredients and chemicals I’ve never heard of is actually healthy for kids and the planet, but I tend to draw the line when it comes to “protein produced by partial hydrolysis of collagen extracted from the bones, connective tissues, organs, and some intestines of animals such as the domesticated cattle, and horses“. Yeah, yum.

I was biking away from the mall the other day, after getting a prescription for a puffer. Apparently, according to my doctor, I’m mildly asthmatic now. I’m not sure if I believe him. Though I think I’d sooner believe him if he told me that my erratic breathing problems, mild as they are, were indications of some kind of cancer. Lymphoma, maybe. It runs in the family.

Anyway, I was on my bike when some dude on a motorcycle pulled up beside me.

“Hey,” he said. “It’d be a lot easier if you had a motor!”

He said it pleasantly, jovially and all i could do was give him a big smile. Because after grumbling about having asthma, what else could i say as he zoomed off. But as always, it comes to me like, five minutes later…

“You’re looking at the motor, dude, and the motor’s running fine!”

Yeah, that’s the best I got.

In other news, I was totally in a very crammed elevator with Dalton McGuinty today. That’s all I have to say about that.

If you’re not into the fixed gear culture, you probably won’t get it. The first “Fixed-push” video is a satire of the subculture of cyclists who ride fixed-gear bicycles.

Technically, I’m a fixed gear cyclist. Except, not really because I don’t own an industrial size messenger bag that could fit beer fridges, I don’t play bike polo, nor have I ever been employed as a bike messenger (or competed in bike messenger competitions.. apparently you don’t have to be a messenger to compete in one :p). Nor did I build my bike from some ultra cool retro frame I pulled out of someone’s old school garage sale and fitted it with stuff that has weird italian and japanese names that I have no clue why it matters. My bike was sold to me “off the peg”… what i see is what i got. Though it doesn’t have a top tube pad, it reviews well, and I kept the brakes on it and even had it equipped with … *gasp drama* … fenders! I do, however, own skinny pants. I don’t think I look so skinny in said pants, but they’re practical for cycling with and they go with everything.

The only thing I’m disappointed in about not belonging to the “fixed gear culture” is that I cannot skid stop for the life of me, and I cannot maintain a trackstand. I wanted to ride fixed for the ability to do trackstands, and so far, I’m not getting it. I guess I’m not so zen with the bike.

Toronto Critical Mass took over the Gardiner Expressway.  I wish I could have been part of that ride.

So, today I went over to the vet’s office to pick up a refill of insulin for Niko. The office isn’t even half a kilometer away. I was on my bike, waiting at a red light, when I tried to remove my left foot prematurely from the clips. The foot got stuck in there… and I knew it was misbehaving even as I was riding away from the house… so down I went. I keeled over right in front of a stopped truck and a lineup of other vehicles waiting at the red. I got up, chuckled to myself, fixed the straps, smiled my embarassment at people in their cars having yuks at my expense.

I got to the vet, and as I waited for the vet assistant to get Niko’s insulin, I checked my damage. I had scraped and bloodied up my left knee, though it looked worse than it felt. I asked the vet assistant if she had any “human first aid”… she had a bandage and gave me some paper towels to clean up in the bathroom, but surprisingly no “human” antibacterial stuff. Come to think of it, I may not have any here either. I got home half an hour ago, gave Niko his shot, and tidied up the front porch a bit. The blood is soaking through this cheap plastic band-aid now so I guess I should take care of my flesh wounds.

I love wearing cycling gloves, by the way. Not only do they look hardcore, I’ve been in two falls this week and haven’t fucked up my hands yet.